The Story Evolves. Waves Crashing Closer to Agent Submission.

July 31, 2015

Thanks to the support of a fellow author, I have been working almost daily this month to move forward with the revisions to Waves Crashing in my search for a new publisher. The flow of the novel is smoother and we have a more intimate sense of Riley, with her first person point of view.


Here is a draft excerpt from one of the latest chapters. Enjoy!


  “Maybe later; I’m busy right now,” I say.

  “No you’re not; you’re just being lazy. Those boys are flying one right over there. We can do better than them. Come ooooonn!”

  “OK, OK,” I say. “Stop pulling.”

I don’t try to stifle my annoyed sigh. Jessica runs off.

  “Here is the perfect spot.”

  “We’ll be right over here, Nana,” I say.

  “You’re a good sister, you know.”

I let out a smirk.

  “I’ll be watching from right here, guarding our spot,” Nana Catherine says.

Jessica pulls the kite out of her bag and lays it out on the sand. The wind gives her a little trouble until she secures the spars and fittings. Jessica nods her head in approval that she has gotten the kite the way she wants it. “Now it looks like a dragon!” she says.

I help her adjust the tail of the kite and Jessica pulls on the handle. She walks slowly down the beach until it lifts into the air. It was so graceful, like she put no effort into it.

  “Wow! Nice job, Jess. It looks great.”

The bright rainbow colors of the dragon’s body and tail ruffle through the air. Jessica has good control of it until the winds picks up and she struggles to hold on. I try to help, but I do no better. The dragon darts across the sky and at one point dives straight down to the water before I give a good yank on the line and it ascends back up. Up and down. Up and down. I think I have it now.

  “Hey there; you’re going to hurt someone with that thing. In case you haven’t noticed this is a family beach. We’d like to keep the violence to a minimum so that everyone goes home alive.”

I am intrigued by this announcement. I get control of Rainbow Dragon and turn around wondering who had gotten into my business.

He’s a guy about my age, maybe a little older with wavy blond hair. It’s almost curly, and longer than I usually care for. It looks unkempt. He has a nice golden tan and some zinc oxide on his nose. It is clear he had been in the sun before today. He stands with his hands on his waist, right above his red swim trunks and has a goofy grin on his face.

  “Can I help –“ While I am busy sizing up this person, trying to decide if he is in fact handsome or just arrogant, I forget about the kite. Just then it again takes a nose dive right into us. I quickly turn around to fix the flight path of Rainbow Dragon when Shaggy Hair Boy moves in behind me and pulls on the line until we are both holding on and Whoever-He-Is helps guide the kite to a safe landing upon the sand.

I look over at Jessica. She has a ridiculous silly grin on her face. She is clearly enjoying this way too much, which irritates me even more. I turn around and inform him of a few things.  

  “Thanks, but I would have had it just fine.”

  “I’m sure you would have. I was just worried about the two innocent kids over there who were about to develop a fear of kites…or dragons…or rainbows. I’m not sure, but it probably would have resulted in a childhood trauma requiring years of therapy to overcome. Just trying to save them some money is all,” he says. He shrugs his shoulders and flashes me a warm smile.

  “You’re just a regular hero, aren’t you?”  

I catch an embarrassed jolt in my voice, unsure if I like this irritating person or not.

  “Some might say that I guess. I am a lifeguard. See-” He is playfully proud. He points to the lifeguard symbol on his trunks and the zinc oxide on his nose. Who is this guy?

  “Hi Mrs. McNamara,” the lifeguard says. He waves to Nana Catherine.

  “Hi Doyle,” Nana Catherine says. “Busy day on the beach today, I see.”

  “Yep, I’m earning my money today, for sure,” he says. There’s that irksome smile again.  

  “You know him?” I say. How can this be possible?

Jessica enjoys this entertainment a little too much. She sits on her beach towel with her knees up, arms wrapped around her lower legs and rests her chin on her knees as she gives me a stupid grin.

  “Yes Dear. He mows the back yard for me and helps me shovel out the driveway whenever we get any decent snow in the winter,” Nana Catherine says.

Shaggy-Haired Lifeguard turns back to me and extends his hand.

  “Doyle Connelly. Nice to meet you.”







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© 2014 by Wendy P. Jones.